I Finally Get to Eat!

When I was a kid,  I loved to collect all of the frosting flowers that nobody else wanted to eat off of cakes at parties. They could keep the cake,  as long as I got to eat frosting! Then one day,  one of my family members looked at me and said,  "Someday you won't be able to eat like that."

I was crushed.

My whole life after that point, I have been paranoid about becoming obese. Heaviness runs in my family, and I see the discomfort and health issues that my loved ones face. I am aware that it would be a lot easier to keep the weight off than it would be to try to get it off later.

Because of this fear, my weight has fluctuated from 145 to 165 for the past 10 years or so... even getting as high as 175 for a briefly depressed time. My way to deal with the issue has always been to cut out sweets, eat a lot less of the healthy food, and lots of running. It works to an extent. I always manage to make it back down to 145 before I level out and I can't live another day without ice cream!

I am currently hovering around the 150-155 range. I look in the mirror and hate how I look. People "my age" are actually starting to give excuses:
◇The older you get,  the harder it is to lose. ◇We can't stay young forever.
◇Pregnancy ruins your body forever.  You'll never get it back.

Yadda, yadda, yadda.

I don't think of myself as old. I don't have joint problems. My bloodwork from my last physical was on point. There aren't any chronic aches or pains, so I can't see any reason why I shouldn't be able to reach my goal. It's just time for a new approach!

So, I have some friends that are into the personal trainer thing... Unfortunately, it is not within my budget. Then someone told me about Bodybuilder.com and I decided to check it out. This is a pretty cool site for someone like me, who is still pretty much a novice. It gives meal plans, 12 week workout routines with the trainer of your choice, supplement suggestions and info, countless articles and forums, and even a section to track your own progress and get to know other people on the same road... all for Free!

Yep. True story.

In addition to all of that, I have a boyfriend that wants to get himself into a healthier lifestyle, and he encourages me to do the same! For once, I don't feel like I'm by myself in this! He encourages me to go to the gym with him,  helps me learn about supplements, talks with me about exercises...

I finally feel that at the "ripe old age of almost-38," I will finally have the support and tools I need to get into the shape that I have always wanted to be in. I have never been more excited about health and nutrition than I am now!

Speaking of nutrition, this new meal plan has me eating all the time (that is how it feels). As I said, what I had done in the past included cutting way back on calories. So, what you are telling me is that I am changing my lifestyle for the better and I'm STILL ALLOWED TO EAT??

Shut the front door! I think I'm going to like this....

Just in time, too, because I just signed up for my second Tough Mudder!

The Re-Interview of My Daughter, Carley

The 2011 Interview with Ms. Carley...

My daughter and I have decided to ask the questions from her original interview from 2011. She was 10 at the time, and is now 12 years old. I think it will be interesting to see what questions have changed and what has stayed the same!

The questions are in Black, her current answers are in Blue, and her 10 year old answers are in Brown. Hope you enjoy! 

1.      Tell me the five best things about you. Freckles, "Awesome Personality," the fact that "I'm your kid," my hair, and my drawing talent. Drawing, singing, funny, smart, awesome freckles
2.      What does the word "success" mean to you? Being able to do what I want when I'm older. They have done something great and have accomplished a task wonderfully
3.      Why do kids put rings in their eyebrows and nose? Because they think that it makes them cooler and they just want to fit in... even tho I think they look like dorks. Because they think it’s cool because they see it on tv. Really it’s not that cool. They think it will make them look more popular.
4.      If you could tell me never to serve two vegetables again, which two would you choose? Pinto Beans and Brussel Sprouts Sweet potatoes and baked carrots.
5.      Who do you think I'd rather you be: an NBA ballplayer, the mayor, a famous explorer, or a movie star? Why? A famous explorer because I could find a really great place for you to live. An NBA player because you hear me talk about basketball a lot and it is fun for me.
6.      Which of your friends do you think I like the most? Why? Nikki, because she's a really big dork and she makes you laugh with her sarcastic comments. Savannah, because she’s honest, funny and really nice.
7.      On a scale of one to nine – one being not at all and nine being totally – how strict do you think I am? Where on the scale would you like me to be? You're a 3 because you want me to succeed, and I would prefer you were a 4 because I need to be pushed harder. You’re a one. You should be a two??? (in a very weak voice)
8.      What would be the ideal allowance? Tell me how you would use it. $10/week; use it for snacks at school, buy duct tape and things like that. $5.00 for stuff that I need like for junk food that I want so you don’t have to pay for my junk food; and toys that I want.
9.      Who was the worst teacher you ever had? Tell me why. Mrs. Kopleman because she's our language arts teacher that hates us. Nope does NOT like us. Gives us the evil eye from across the room! Oh my goodness! Mrs. J, because she is very, very strict. If you just mess up little things, you could get into a lot of trouble. She was strict.
10.  What would the ideal teacher be like? She would  be just like Mrs. Eddings because she cares for us like we're her own kids. She's easier on us. Very sweet, and just like Mrs. Scott or my mommy.
11.  Which one of your friends is the funniest looking? Why? Ramone because he looks like a dinosaur from the side because he has a big head and a Mohawk!! (she is cracking up right now) Mia, because she has a flat nose, and she always has her eyebrows scrunched up. It’s funny.
12.  If you could arrange it, what time would I come home from work? Then, what would we do together? You wouldn't go to work, but still get paid because that would be awesome. We would have a "girls' day" every day because we would be rich! You would come home at Lunch time, so we could go to lunch together and then have a girl’s night after.
13.   Can you think of any clothes that I should never put on again? Why? If you had anything lacy, I wouldn't want to see that. It's scary for any person in this world! Nobody should wear lace ever. If you’ve ever worn it, you should never wear it again.
14.  If a genie would give you only one wish, which would you pick, and why? being world-class attractive, being a genius, or being famous for doing something great? Famous for something great, because I would be doing something I love like helping kids with special needs or something like that. The last one, because I would gets lot of money so that I could take care of my family and myself.
15.  If you are feeling sad, what meal that I could make or order would be the one that would cheer you up? I like it when you make ice cream sundaes. Ice cream always makes me feel better.
16.  Are you afraid when we fly? No, because I'm with somebody. If I were alone, it would be scary because people scare me. No, it’s fun.
17.  Tell me who you think are the three greatest musicians in the world? Cher Lloyd, Bruno Mars, and Liam Payne Elvis Presley, Taylor Swift, Michael Jackson.
18.  If you could change three things about yourself, what would they be? My shoe size, because I have big feet; My height because I'm short; My laugh because I sound like a dying walrus. Nothing. I like myself perfectly.
19.  What are the qualities that make a good friend? Trust, respect, funny, and loving. Truthfulness, kindness, funniness
20.  What was your favorite toy when you were little?  Poly Pockets! my teddy bear
21.  What do you say to comfort yourself when something scares you (like when a plane is bumpy, of when you are in a scary place)? (breaking into song) "This girl is on fire!!" No, but really... I don't really say anything to myself. I just try to stay calm. It’s ok, just go to your happy place.
22.  What do you think makes a person good-looking? Their personality. The inside is what counts.
23.  If you could decorate our place, what would it look like? It would be a big house with a bunch of rooms; lazy river going through the house; the walls would be rainbow w/ peace signs and band posters everywhere. It would be pink and purple and light blue all over.
24.  What do you think of my driving? Um, it's good. It's just the other idiots on the road! (No, I didn't pay her for that answer!!) Awesome. It’s better than chuck’s.
25.  Looking at your pictures. When do you think you have been the cutest so far? Dude, I've always been cute! When I was a baby.
26.  What is the most enjoyable thing our family has done together in the last three years? Going to the Coke Museum and the Atlanta Aquarium in the same day! Go to the Atlanta aquarium and the coke museum in the same day.
27.  What is the nicest thing a friend has ever done for you? Take me to get my nails done and a girls' weekend! They had my back when I got into trouble.
28.  Why do you, or don't you, like violent movies? I like them because it's fun watching people get hurt. It's a good way to vent anger. They just give me the creeps!
29.  What sport (that you haven't tried) do you think you would be good at? On a swim team because I can hold my breath for a long time and I'm a fast swimmer. Skateboarding
30.  If you were going to have a weird, unusual pet, what would it be? Why would you want that pet? I would want a llama so it will spit in the faces of the people I don't like! An elephant; it’s protective, humungous, it can be a ride, very loving, and I want to name it Ellie.
31.  If you could look like anyone, who would it be? Why? A combination of my mom and Jess because I already do and it's fabulous! My mommy because I already do!
32.  Do you think girls look better with or without makeup? Why? It depends on the person. Some people don't take care of themselves and kind of need it. Other people have good skin and don't really need makeup. Without makeup, because they need to show themselves; with makeup, they are just making themselves look fake.
33.  What is the scariest movie you've ever seen? Why? That move... that I watched with Ashleigh... that one time... at that one place... your friend's house... It had that lady that ate people's tongues. It was so creepy! Dead silent; because the woman ate people’s tongues
34.  What is the grossest thing you can think of? Jess licked her ID card to make it work in the swiper at work! (ew) Snakes
35.  What would you do if you were invisible for a day? I would stalk Channing Tatum... Play pranks on people, especially my sister
36.  Do you ever have a dream that comes back over and over? If so, what is it like? A dream that I get the day before my birthday every year. You (mom) gets captured by a demon and you hide me under a bathroom sink. I have to go through different worlds to find you and I can hear you screaming on every world. When I do find you, you're almost dead. (Might need therapy?? lol) Yes. A nightmare that has come ever since right before my 5^th birthday; a goblin/demon that captures you and Ashleigh, and I have to come and find you. It scares me.
37.  Why do you think some people don't like animals? Because they're just stupid. Because they might be allergic, or they might think it’s too much work.

As she gets older, Carley is turning into a smart, funny, beautiful young lady. She has a good heart and is a kind person. She is currently growing her hair out to donate for Locks of Love, plays the Flute at school, and is interested in doing things to help needy children when she is older. As her mother, I couldn't be more proud of the beautiful lady that outshines me at every turn. I look forward to seeing what new amazing things she has in store for herself!

Body Stereotypes

As many of you probably know, I had lost about 40 pounds in the beginning of last year. This year, I'm working on improving my overall strength, especially my upper body. In May, I will be taking part in the Tough Mudder obstacle course with some teammates, which is about 10-13 miles long.

As I am working on getting myself into better and better shape, I notice that a lot of the muscles that I had while growing up are starting to return. It's like my body already knows how to develop strength... I just haven't pushed it in about 20 years.

(A little background... I grew up on a dairy farm, so I always helped bail hay, carry buckets, lift bags of grain, etc. Because of my upbringing, I was pretty strong for a girl of my age.)

So, thankfully, my body remembers being strong and I'm getting back in that direction.

While spending all this time at the gym, I also do research on eating healthy, proper food choices, vitamins and supplements, etc. I also have "liked" a few pages on Facebook that show other women that also work hard and are proud of the improvements that they have made with their bodies.

Personally, I love being strong.

I love the independence that it allows me, especially since I have a mostly-guy dominated job.

I don't, however, wish to become a body builder that sprays their tans on and stands in front of a crowd in a bikini and flexes. To me, those women have over-done it and are no longer feminine. While I do want to see stomach muscles ripple and my calves move when I walk... I don't want to look like that.

Basically, I am trying to find a happy medium. I just want definition without losing my "girlish figure."

I am posting a picture of what I feel I would like to look like. You can see the girl's muscles, but she's not all veiny and body-builder-ish. To me, she is still very sexy and feminine... I have, however, had different men tell me that she's not attractive and that they don't want someone with "that many muscles."

Please post your opinions... I look forward to reading them!