Life is Very Good

Do you ever just feel overwhelmed by your own life? I mean in a good way....
I have had bottom-of-the-barrel low points in my life. If it CAN go wrong, it DID. No matter what I touched, no matter how hard I tried, things just didn't work out the way I had planned/hoped.
Things have turned around! All of the pain, fear, loneliness, loss, etc. have faded into the background. I appreciate them because they are part of who I am today, but more than anything, my experiences have made me thankful. I appreciate so much more... the little things.
My life is far from perfect. I'm still nowhere near where I want to be... but I can feel the progress! I finally have a PARTNER in my life. Someone that I trust and can talk about anything with. I can finally enjoy a holiday season without the burden of worry. I can see the Christmas lights and smile... not wonder how I will find a way to buy gifts for my children. I look forward to going to sleep and waking every day with my partner by my side.
I know that while things aren't where I want them to be YET, they are indeed headed in the right direction. — feeling loved 

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A few years ago, I told my mom that I was "finally content" after my divorce. Unfortunately, I had content confused with happy!

In 2013, I learned that life isn't about just settling for things. If something is not making you happy, you are responsible for changing it! I did what I needed to and found the best thing ever! I am thrilled to wake up every day to see what will happen next.

I have a beautiful family, a great job, amazing friends.... I am the luckiest person on earth... and I know that 2014 will be even more awesome.

 Happy New Year to each of you. May your world be filled with happiness and goodness and love. And thank you for playing whatever part you play in my life. You are still here because you add to my happiness!!!  — feeling Amazeballs.

Appreciating My Family

*{This was a post from last Christmas, when I got out my decorations.}*

So I was completely bummed out today because what little Christmas stuff that I have hung on to after my many moves over the past several years (I held onto things with sentimental value) was mostly ruined when I got it out of my storage today. Somehow, water got into this plastic tote and anything that had material/fabric was covered in mold and had to be thrown away. Many of the ornaments that had paint were peeling, so they also ended up in the trash.

But...

The more I thought about it, the better I felt. I have wonderful, NEW additions to my family... Ashleigh and Carley are happy and healthy, and we have a lot of memories. I don't have to hang on to every ornament they ever made me to prove that. So, maybe it is time to get new, fresh Christmas decorations to help create new memories. The more I processed all of this, the more I became happy about putting my tree up early (due to the schedule with the kids), and I think I'm even starting to get excited about this holiday season.... which is something that I haven't really felt in a long, long time.

I've said it before, but I will say it again:
Life is, indeed, very good....  — feeling blessed and loved with Jonathan Lee.

Merry Christmas!

Hey, Everyone! Here's hoping that your holidays are awesome, surrounded by people that you love.

There's a lot going on here! I've been dieting, so I've been running... a lot... I am working up to a 5k after the new year. It may not sound like a big deal to any of you that are natural runners, but let me just tell you that I am NOT a good runner. I've always loved it, but I'm slow, and I tire easily. So, this is a really big deal for me. It is my way for rewarding myself for no longer being a smoker. (I quit in May).

In other news, I am going down to Florida to pick Carley up for Christmas Vacation! YAY!!! While I'm in Jacksonville, I'm also going to be visiting VP-30 at NAS Jax. That was the last command that I was in while still in the Navy, and now they're being run by government contractors... And I have three friends trying to help me get my foot in the door down there. No guarantees on the job, but it looks like I'm going to get back down to Florida one way or another! I'm really excited to be closer to Carley.

Ashleigh hasn't decided what she wants to do. She wants to go back to Florida, but doesn't want to leave her friends up here. Either way, I support her decision (although I would love her to go back to Jax with me.) I have to face the fact that she is growing up (will be 20 years old in less than a month!!!), and give her the space she needs.

Otherwise, we are all headed up to Michigan for a week, after I get Carley on Friday. I'm driving back to Gainesville to get Chuck and Ash, and then driving to Michigan. I'm excited, because it will be the first time I'd been to one of Grandma Marion's Christmas Parties in about 8 or 9 years! Plus, I'll get to see a lot of cousins and friends that I have not seen in a really long time.

So, my karma seems to be taking a good turn (knock on wood) and things are looking up. Sometimes bad things (loss of a job) need to happen before good things can take their place.

Merry Christmas everyone!!